Whenever new gear is announced, you can be sure the trolls and flamers will come out in force. One of the best places to see some of the action are the comment threads over on www.dpreview.com. DPReview is a great site run by great people who try their best to be fair and objective when comparing different makes and models of cameras to one another. They have been around forever, and are probably one of the best resources on the net for in-depth camera reviews. Because of this, they get a HUGE amount of traffic. Which attracts…all types. Take a gander at some of the comedy gold I mined from JUST 2 THREADS on one of the new cameras announced recently by Canon:
In response to "Canon 5D3 Low-Light ISO Samples" by DPReview. Courtesy of echelon2004:
1600 look ok, the rest is just smudge. So, not really à jpg camera?
This is a good example of the most common responses at DPReview: some kind of an overly negative or positive statement which you think makes sense until you realize that you aren't a head trauma patient.
In response to "Canon 5D3 Low-Light ISO Samples" by DPReview. Courtesy of zsozs:
OMG !!!!! dpreview.com !! You cant take a foto ????What are you doing ???Shutter speed !!! Shutter speed !! Look !No body use the Shutter speed 1/10 in real life !The test ist not good ,if you use higher shutter speed have much NOISE in low light (1/60,1/100) and its sure iso 3200 much noise you will see !
Can’t tell if troll. I really, really, can't tell if troll.
In response to "Canon 5D3 Low-Light ISO Samples" by DPReview. Courtesy of VivaLasVegas:
Easily beating D4 at 25600 without even breaking a sweat.
This was said before any high ISO samples for the D4 had even been released. This guy must have photo gear ESP. SOMEONE HIRE THIS MAN!
In response to "Canon 5D3 Announcement" by DPReview. Courtesy of vFunct:
Nikon wins.Time for everyone to sell their Canon gear.Better luck next time Canon.
This was posted approximately 5 minutes after the announcement was made. It took me about 20 minutes just to read the post he was referring to…lol?
In response to "Canon 5D3 Announcement" by DPReview. Courtesy of canon6188:
This is the PERFECT camera ! Nikon users who consider upgrade to D800 shall weep for another 3 years. Huge upgrade in term of auto focus and ISO plus 6 FPS, who needs 36MP noise ridden, computer busting (huge file size) camera of Nikon …I am getting one soon, give me …….QUICK ….
Ah yes, the classic "MY CAMERA IS SO MUCH BETTER THAN YOURS THAT YOU ARE GOING TO PROBABLY HAVE TO KILL YOURSELF OUT OF SHAME" response.
In response to "Canon 5D3 Announcement" by DPReview. Courtesy of tell the truth:
This is like new paint on an old car. Yawn. This is what the 5d 2 should have been. canon is asleep. Nokia 808 phone BLOWS THERE DOORS OFF !I just dont get it .. A phone camera has more mega pixels than a almost four grand slr!! Sony is going to be around 58 mega pixel,, And NIKON is 36 at 3 grand. What did I miss? This is why canon lost 20 per cent of the pro market last year. Add another 20 per cent loss this year. What a sad day.
TL;DR – phones are now SLRs.
In response to "Canon 5D3 Announcement" by DPReview. Courtesy of Prestidigitator:
So all the Noink fanbois repeating the mantras "12MP is enough" and "High ISO is more important than megapixels" since 2007 are now changing their tune? LOL. As if these fanbois even print their pictures to huge sizes that they require 36MP.
Noink? Fanboi? What are you, 5?
In response to "Canon 5D3 Announcement" by DPReview. Courtesy of METROMODEPHOTO:
well"well" "well", 5D MARK-3 AT 22MP AND D800 AT 36MP THEN BOTH FOR AROUND 3.300 {WHATS-UP-WITH-"THAT"} CANON? I WOULD THINK THAT THE 5D MARK -3 WOULD HAVE MORE MP FOR THE MONEY", AT LEAST WITH 45MP GIVING YOU THE OPTION TO GO DOWN TO 22MP WOULD BE NICE.I LIKE TO UPGRADE TO A SECOND BODY FROM MY 7D AND HAVE A FULL SIZE SENSOR SLR FOR ONCE. IT LOOKS LIKE NIKON ANSWERED THE "Q" FOR ME. NO PLAN ON SWITCHING AT ALL BUT, IT WOULD BE NICE IF YOUR GOING TO UPGRADE THE 5D MARK-2 TO A "3", THEN DO IT IN EVERY WAY I WOULD THINK". MABY THERE IS A "5D-X" WHO KNOWS, I GUES WE WILL SEE IN DO TIME""OH", DID I MENTIONED THAT THE NEW 24-70 2.8 USM L HAS A WHOPPING 82MM FILTER LENS TREAD ,"YES THAT RIGT" IF YOU WANT A UV OR A CLR POLARIZER , YOUR GOING TO HAVE TO PAY THE BIG BUCS TO GO FROM 77MM TO 82MM FOR THE "SAME FOCAL RANGES ON YOUR 2.8 24-70 USM L PREVIOUS MODEL , NOT GOOD NEWS AT ALL!!!————————————OH, YEAH" I WOULD LIKE TO UPGRADE FROM MY AWSOME 7D APS SENSOR TO A FULL SIZE SENSOR SOME DAY AND END THE GET THE LATEST AND THE NEWEST "RAT-RACE" SOME DAY BUT, I AM WELL DISAPPOINTED WITH THE RIDICULOUS "ONE" MORE MP 21MP 5D-2 TO A 22MP 5D-3 UPGRADE. YES,IT DOES MAKE A DIFFERENCE SINCE NIKON OFFERED 36MP WITH THE NICE OPTION OF GOING DOWN TO 22MP FOR EXTRA FINE DETAIL AND SOME DAY IF YOU LIKE TO BLOW UP LARGE PHOTOS AND GET THE EXTRA DETAILS WELL ITS ALL THERE AND READILY AVAILABLE. ITS JUST LIKE HAVING AN SLR THAT SHOOTS HD VIDEO.I DO NOT DO VIDEO YET BUT AS I SAID BEFORE, IT IS NICE TO HAVE THE OPTION TO. "YES, OPTIONS ARE GOOD.————————————IN MY CONCLUSION, IS IT WORH UPGRADING FROM A 7D OR A 5D-2 TO A 5D-3? CONSIDERING THE MEANING OF "UPGRADE", THE D800 WOULD TRULY FIT THAT DESCRIPTION. I WILL NOT MAKE A SWITCHOVER AT THIS TIME BUT, WHO KNOWS THE FUTURE". FOR ME ITS ABOUT ENDING THE NEVER ENDING RAT-RACE FOR THE LATEST AND THE NEWEST SOME DAY. I GUES WE ALL DO IT ONCE OR TWICE IN A LIFETIME. AND YES BOTH CAMERAS ARE VERY VERY GOOD IN THEIR WAYS FOR SURE. HOWEVER, NIKON IS GIVING YOU YOUR MONEYS WORTH IN THIS CATEGORY. CANON IS MY CHOICE FOR NOW, BUT THEY NEED TO SMELL THE COFFEE FAST.
This one is actually 3 separate comments, made approximately 5 minutes after one another. It's like someone taught a 6 year old enough English to form words, but not enough to make ANY DAMN SENSE.
In response to "Canon 5D3 Announcement" by DPReview. Courtesy of Cliff Watson:
Canon, really? This is the best you can do? Is there a real "new" camera coming like a 3D or a 9D that will keep serious photographers in the fold?
Because people weren’t making beautiful images with 6MP cameras from 10 years ago. Ansel Adams is spinning is his fucking grave.
In response to "Canon 5D3 Announcement" by DPReview. Courtesy of GabrielZ:
What! 22 MP only!How's that going to compete with Nikon's D800? I know 36MP might be overkill for the monent considering the resolving power of current lenses. Still disappointing though. The 5D Mark II had nearly twice the resolution of the 5D, so I was at least expecting a 50% increase for the Mark III. Is this Canon admitting it's lenses aren't good enough resolution wise?
Let's break this down logically. A > B because B has more C than A. But C doesn't matter. But A still > B. Trust me on this one, guys.
In response to "Canon 5D3 Announcement" by DPReview. Courtesy of Francis Carver:
On to the specs of this "new" EOS 5D wonder….."It can shoot 6 frames per second"Wow, only 6 fps? In the year 2012? That's nothing to write home about, is it now? Re. video, it can shoot 1080p at 24, 25, and 30 frames per second. But so could the previous Canon EOS 5D that came out 3.5 years ago, right? The new 5D cannot even do 1080p60 video — another fatal mishap. Nor will the new 5D be able to put out uncompressed HDMI, like the Nikons will be able to do, wow!!! All you can do with the new EOS 5D is what you could with the old one — record video only internally, not externally.For external recording capabilities with a connected video field recorder at superior bitrates, you will need to go with the NIKON D800 or NIKON D4, correct? Giant advantage: NIKON.Mono audio recording only — yeah, right. I would have thought that SOMEONE at Canon must have heard of the word "stereo" by now, huh? But at least they give you a headphone jack, like the Nikons do.————————————"The EOS 5D Mark III features a new Creative Photo button, which enables users to quickly select Picture Styles."Wow, so for $3,500, this Canon camera will give you capabilities that every $200 and up point-and-shoot pocketable camera now has — Picture Styles. Wow…. Veddy professional, indeed.According to DP Review, the price will be $3,500 for the body alone. On the Canon web site, there is NO PRICE for this camera. And there is also NO PRICE still for the EOS 1D X that Canon had announced exactly four months ago! Maybe they are giving that one away for free, who really knows?Considering that the $3,000 NIKON D800 dwarfs this new Canon EOS 5D in most technological aspects, not to mention that it looks much better, good luck to Canon for selling these "new" 5D bodies at $3,500 a pop…. or even close to it.Only hard-core Canon fiends need to apply here, I suspect. :-((
This is one of those posts that seems to make a point…until you realize that the OP is actually full of shit. 1) Both the D800 and 5D3 can shoot at 6FPS. 2) No Canon or Nikon on the market can do 1080×60. EDIT: As was pointed out in the comments, numerous Sonys can do 1080×60. 3) Both the D800 and 5D3 record mono audio without an external mic. 4) He bashes on picture styles when that is how any serious videographer controls things like contrast, saturation, and sharpness (and is something that has been in every Canon body for the last half a decade).
And now on to some of the good responses. You know, the ones which restore your faith in humanity
In response to "Canon 5D3 Announcement" by DPReview. Courtesy of d smith:
Awesome, I love how folks are always ready to abandon ship at announcements. Go ahead and dump your gear, just let me know where I can get your stuff for a used price while you switch sides to buy new again, only to repeat at the next announcement! haha The gear by these companies surpass the knowledge and effort most fanboys will ever practice anyway. Go back to film bitches
The classic "oh, you're quitting WoW? Can I have your gold ploz?" response. It's so true, though.
In response to "Canon 5D3 Announcement" by DPReview. Courtesy of Mulder_:
I am reading a lot of forums about totally different topics, why is it that photographers are the worst people i come across in the internet. Canon/Nikon owners are worse fanboys than Apple owners… jeeeez, get a grip, let people have their opinions, discuss the camera and stop the hating, it is embarrassing!
He's right – the amount of vitrol that spews forth during these camera announcement times is on the same level as the GOP primary. Or Thanksgiving dinner at Aunt Bessie's house.
In response to "Canon 5D3 Announcement" by DPReview. Courtesy of backayonder:
British Grand Prix, Brands Hatch 1982.I saw something that has always stayed in my mind when it comes to photography and gear.I couldn't help but notice the working Professional photographers going about their work.They had battered cameras and lenses held together with gaffer tape attached to monopods. Their photo's graced the newspapers on Monday and no doubt the glossy racing magazines later.Waiting for the race to begin I noticed a keen amateur photographer in front of me. He had a pristine aluminium case. He eventually opened it to reveal a shiny Canon A1 and numerous lenses. They were immaculate. The foam protecting his gear was so sharply cut it could draw blood.The crowd around him, bored, looked on.But oh no what is this? A piece of grass had blown onto the foam! Manicured fingers quickly moved in to remove the errant grass and brushed away any dirt. Wow what a lucky escape.The crowd around him watched on in amazement at this total plonker.A camera is just a tool.
I love this. I love it so much. Thanks, mystery denizen of the internet.
Anyway, for those of you who aren't batshit insane, I hope you are as excited as I am for the new offerings from Canon, Nikon, and other companies. Every year the bar is raised, my only hope is that my skills can improve in proportion to the technology.
{ 6 comments… read them below or add one }
I wish this stuff was funny – it isn’t! You would think these people own canon and nikon. You would think the fate of the world is decided by megapixel count. Many of the posters won’t even buy a camera – they have a dream camera and talk about it all day instead of going outside their moms basement, getting a job, and buying something (maybe even help the economy).
Its a crazy trend, like you suggested, Canon vs. Nikon, GOP vs. Democrats, PC vs Mac, Cats vs Dogs, Muslim vs Jews, humans are horrible. I’d hate to see what Thanksgiving is like at your aunts house. LOL.
In recent months there has been a huge increase in vulgarity on the internet, civil places like youtube used to have a darkside, but now the whole site is a darkside. People have lost the ability to reason, comprehend, coexist, the concept of manners is gone, and people lie and cheat – just to get more traffic and click revenue. Everyone sees conspiracies everywhere now. Nothing is what it seems they say. I was watching a video that actually said that 9/11 wasn’t done by aircraft, “thats what they want you to think- thats too easy” no, they said, it must have been area 51 anti gravity balls! With 175000 views it has over 80% thumbs up! How?
I don’t care if its a nikon or a canon, just buy something nice and take photos of the idiots I described when they leave their moms basement to cash their welfare check at the casino. You’ll know who they are, they will be the ones wearing aluminum foil hats, hairy palms and thick glasses because they are nearly blind – but with a 2% milk complexion, since they never really go anywhere or do anything.
after 4 billion years man has devolved to trolls – there is a heading for ya! (copyright, all rights reserved) LOL
Blind loyalty is a scary thing. Whether it be for brands or ideals, sometimes people need to step back and really look at what they are saying before they say it. Cheers.
Ha ha. Good stuff. Thanks for collecting all of the good stuff in one place. You saved me at least an hour of sifting through all of the half-baked rants. 🙂
Hah, no problem, Tony – glad you enjoyed it.
My little Sony NEX-5N can do 60p video.
Ah, thanks for the reminder. I’ve updated the post :).